guide me

I want to hear your voice and listen to your guidance. I know you're there and you're always with me and you promise to guide me. Help me obey when I know it's you telling me what to do.

1. How do I handle this? I want to only blame him because he's old enough and mature enough to know better, to choose to handle things better and to control himself. But she's not innocent either. He's the one who did me wrong, not her. We're not friends so she has no commitment, no obligation to me whatsoever. I don't have a problem with her. But him, he told me all these things and then just changed his mind? Or was it all lies? You told me I have to forgive. How do I do that? What does that look like? Just not holding a grudge? Or does that mean trying to make things right? Confronting him and telling him... what exactly? Maybe giving him a chance to explain himself? I mean I do at least deserve an explanation don't I? Or do I? Maybe I don't deserve anything? As for her, I can be nice to her. Not to make her feel bad necessarily, but because she needs a friend. She obviously looks at me and sees something that she doesn't have. I don't mean I want to be her friend as in hang out with her and trust her with my life story. But she needs some decent role model in her life, someone to look at and think "I should be more like that." So I'm just gunna be nice to her, even when she gets on my nerves. I have to do my best to understand her.

2. I hate this class. I want to drop it but I'm not sure if that's what you want me to do. It's painful to sit in class listening to "blahbblahblahblahhhhhblah" and I hate being in class with freshmen who have no respect and being treated like I'm just another one of them. But I need this class to graduate. Should I take it somewhere else? Should I just stick this out? I don't want to act out of my emotions. Tell me what to do.

3. Did I handle that correctly? I had a problem with getting assignments and not having enough time to do them. I didn't mean any disrespect but apparently I offended him. Is he wrong? Aren't we supposed to not be easily offended? When he confronted me did I react correctly? I guess I can't change it now but help me to have the right attitude about it and to learn to handle things better next time so that I don't offend someone over something so small.

4. So I have this job and I really like it. I love the kids and helping them. I love the hours and the convenience. Plus it pays more than I get at my other job. Is this really what you want me to do? Or is this just me fulfilling my own desires. I believe it's what you've called me to, but if not please show me that. Help me to be patient with the children and show them the love of Jesus.

5. Moving out. UGH MOVING OUT ... Sounds so stressful when I address it after all these other issues. But it's something I really want to do. But not my will, but yours. Is this what you want me to do? Is it better for me to stay home? If it is the right thing for me to move out, then is Lindi the right roommate? I really hope so. We get along so well. It would be helpful to have a 3rd roommate as well. Is Kaila the right one? It kinda looks like you've worked things out so that she needs a place at the same time we do, but maybe that's just how things happened. Maybe it's not. Maybe it's your plan. I pray that you'll show all three of us what the right thing to do is! Give us details so we know we're exactly where you want us.

It's so nice to be able to talk to you. Not that I ever couldn't talk to you, but now I'm actually trying to listen and do what you tell me. As soon as I made that commitment in my mind, to listen to you, to follow you, to obey when I know it's your guidance... I get all these new situations to try me. I'm not surprised though. That's what you said is going to happen. Give me strength to get through. Thank you for being always with me.

6. I don't want a husband. Not like that. Not who can't control himself. I trust you to give me the right man. Help me to wait for him and not just jump at the first one who makes the butterflies flutter inside me. I know you convicted me about the last relationship and you were right. Surprise, surprise. But please, don't let me be able to live with the guilt when I know I'm in something that I shouldn't be, but before that help me to follow your guidance so I know I'm not getting into it in the first place. Help me be patient and to remember that you have the best one for me. I'm so glad you know what's best for me so I don't have to try to decide on my own.

7. Thank you for putting good people in my life, the ones that are the best for me. Thank you for Jessica because even though our relationship has changed, she's a good friend and a blessing. Her relationships and the way she handles life is encouraging and sometimes gives me a picture of what I should do. Thank you for Jimmy because he really loves me. It's weird because ... he's the last person I'd expect to love me. But he stands up for me and I know he'd protect me anytime. I really need that, so thank you. Thank you for Lindi because she's just the best. She always makes me feel better. She doesn't get mad because I complain too much or tell me to shut up when I just can't be happy. She puts up with me and makes me laugh like no one else can haha. It's funny how you put us together when our families are in the same position. Thank you for sam because he can just listen and understand. He's easy to talk to and gives me comfort. Plus he'll give me a hug to cheer up any day. I guess you did put me at panera for a reason. Thanks for showing me that.